With You Always Take 2
by Miss Woozy
Summary: Alternate ending to With You Always. Post Twilight fic. Tony finds a letter from Kate. Kate still alive


With You Always (Take 2)

Disclaimer: I do not own NCIS & never will – no matter how much I ask for it :( - I'm 18 in a few weeks can I have it then :p. Emily, Nathan and Jane are my own creations.

A/N: This is the second version of _With You Always_ with the alternate ending. You do not need to had read the other one, but you may wish to read _Yankee_ _White Tate Style_ or _What the Future Holds_ for the character history. This one has a happier ending. I was going to have Ziva be Kate's replacement, but I'm growing to like her, & so didn't really want to kill her off!

Hope you enjoy :D

* * *

Tony was clearing out some of the files of Kate's in the study, when he came across several envelopes. One had his name on it, while the other two had Emily's, all in Kate's familiar scrawl. Curious, he sat down on the chair, unsure whether to open them or not. Normally, Kate would have a go at him for opening her things, but as it was addressed to him, he thought that she wouldn't mind. 'She was gonna give it to me at some point anyway.' 

Upon opening the letter, he soon discovered that it had been written before Kate and Emily moved back in with him, whilst they were still separated.

_Dear Tony_

_If you are reading this, then something must have happened to me, and I am no longer with you. I do not know what has happened, but I hope that it was in doing something that I love. You were always a fantastic husband and father, and I know that you will continue to be. Just promise to take care of Emily for me while I am gone. Make sure that she remembers me, but carry on with your lives – both of you. I will always be thinking of you._

_I know you probably don't believe me, but I never stopped loving you. I cannot express how sorry I am at the pain I caused you. I never meant to hurt you. Despite all the things that were said towards the end, we really did have a great marriage, something I never forgot. You should know that there has never been anyone else, not even whilst we were married. Nothing happened between James and me, though it may to too late to convince you now, but you refused to listen to us. I was on my way to explain and try to sort it out when I saw who you were with. I never originally wanted to take the papers with me, but took them on impulse. I honestly believe that we could have made it work, but were both too stubborn to try._

_You deserve to have been involved in Emily's life, more then an outsider. My biggest regret is leaving you, not only because of my loss, but of the pain Emily went through, seeing her parents arguing and not understanding why. It broke my heart every time you left, watching the look on her face. After each visit, she would spend the following week asking when Daddy was coming home. I never knew what to say._

_There should be another couple of envelopes for Emily. One of them is for her to read (or be read) now, but the other is to be kept until she turns eighteen, to tell her all the things she deserves to hear, but can't. I know I won't be there for her as she grows up, but remind her that I will be watching and listening, so you can both talk to me anytime. I will always be proud of her, and I will give you strength when you most need it._

_I don't expect you to be alone forever. I just want you to promise me that you will be happy. I will always love you and never forget that. The few years we had together were the best years of my life, as short as they were and I know that my last thoughts will have been of you._

_With you always_

_Love_

_Kate DiNozzo_

Putting the letter down, Tony soon noticed tears had made their way down his cheeks. He thought back to what life had been like before that day on Air Force One. He supposed he should have thanked that reporter, as sick as that sounded, for bringing them back together.

Two years ago, Kate joined NCIS and came back into his life. Now he couldn't imagine how he could have coped all this time without her. Not only did she bring back Emily, his daughter, but two months ago also gave him a son, Nathan. The two of them argued about when she should go back to work, but eventually Tony won, with the help of Nathan and Emily, saying that she should stay with the kids a little longer.

The four of them had just come home after attending the funeral of Kate's 'replacement,' Jane Whiteland, who had been shot by Ari on the rooftop. Kate was struggling to come to terms with the fact that it should have been her, but had instead remained at home. Ducky called it 'Survivor's Guilt' even if she never witnessed the actual event. Reading the letter made some of Tony's own feelings emerge, about what might have happened if Kate was on that rooftop. Suddenly in need of her contact, he stood up and walked through the hallway to the nursery.

"Hey." He called to her.

Turning around, Kate saw Tony leaning against the doorframe, holding a crumpled letter. At first she was confused as to what he had found, but after noticing the tear stains on his cheeks, she soon recognized it. "You been going through my stuff again?" She joked, smiling slightly.

Looking down at his hand, Tony realized he was still carrying the letter. "Sorry about that, I was looking for something else and came across this." He paused, "Makes an interesting read."

"Yeah? Well at the time, I had no idea whether we were ever gonna get back together or not. I think I wrote it just before we saw each other again. I thought I'd gotten rid of it." She suddenly felt self-conscience.

She looked up as she heard footsteps heading towards her. "You ever write another one?" She shook her head.

"No, guess I thought that we would be safer working at NCIS, and won't need to worry, but perhaps I was wrong." Tears had begun to form in her eyes. "I just can't help thinking that it could have been me there," she looked at him straight in the eye, "What would you have done if it had been me?" The tears that had managed to escape were brushed away with Tony's thumb.

"It would have broken my heart. That day repeats over and over in my head but each time it gets worse and it's often you who's shot. I don't know if I would have been able to cope without you." He looked down into the cot, "Especially with Nathan."

Kate placed a finger under his chin to bring his face towards hers. "Promise me that if anything happened to me, that you would not mourn forever, even if it's for the sake of the kids, but move on with your life." Slowly, he nodded in response. "What I wrote in that letter is still true. I love you and I want you to be happy."

"I love you too." He smiled and lowered his head to capture her lips. A small whimper beside them drew them back to reality and Kate bent down to pick up Nathan. Watching her, he realized that things will be alright.


End file.
